Category: blogs

Circle of life

The difference between life and death is literally breath!

In order to be blessed with the gift of life, you will at some point and time experience the pain of physical death. I say physical death because the spirit of a person lives far beyond the physical body is capable of.

Remember, life although a blessing does not always seem fair and likewise death does not discriminate taking old and young alike.

It’s hard not to question those things which you truly do not understand, it does not make you a bad person it makes you one that is hurting.

How you deal with death is a personal thing and likewise so is the grieving process.

No one can tell someone else how to grieve or what an acceptable grieving time frame should be.

Rather we have to understand that there are varying stages of grief and they are not always followed in a logical or sequential order.

Loss of life causes a gaping hole in the lives of those connected to the person.

We grieve not just the loss of life, but sometimes we lose purpose and connection that the person afforded us.

For those who have become caregivers of the deceased, we have to now find something to fill the free time we find ourselves with.

What do we do with ourselves when our days are no longer bombarded with caring for others, doctors appointments, cooking, cleaning and the like?

What happens when we are no longer busy, being busy?

That is usually the time when grief becomes real, after the memorials, funerals and family have all gone back to living their lives.

The grief can be enveloping and if you are not careful, all consuming. It can be the heaviest thing you have ever carried in your life and without a support system, it can overtake and overpower you.

Whether that support system is friends/family, spirituality or faith based, ground yourself in that support.

It’s easy to isolate yourself and feel as if no one else knows the pain of your loss and while all loss is individualized in how it affects you, there are many others that have felt the pain of loss in their lives.

I have learned through the many experiences I have had with death, those occurring naturally and even murder, ranging from miscarriage, childhood best friends, parents, sibling and other family members that the best way to honor a death is to keep or start living a purpose filled life.

Death, if nothing else, teaches us that time is limited and for some it is more limited than for others.

We must live each day with the determination to live our best life. It is the simplest way to honor the love, legacy and spirit of those that have gone before us.

Does that mean we won’t have days filled with tears or intermittent moments of sadness, of course not, emotions and the ability to express those feelings make us intimately more human.

But don’t drown in those depressed emotions, because life with all its twists and turns is a true gift and we must go on!

Time doesn’t truly erase all grief, but it does make it a lighter load to bear!

So brush off the happiest memory you can find from the recesses of your mind and clothe yourself in that memory.

Let the warmth of that moment envelope you and let the smile that it brings act as a light to illuminate all your darkest hours.

Go forth love, laugh and most of all LIVE!!

~micaiah

 

 

Sparking the flame

Sometimes it’s hard to follow through on realizing a dream. Oftentimes for no other reason than we stand in our own way. We let the minor details overwhelm us into do nothingness. Instead of combating each small goal one step at a time. We get comfortable in the darkness and stop working towards the light.

 

This was a problem I battled. For years friends and acquaintances alike encouraged me to write a book, to get my words out there. And for years I hemmed and hawed and smiled saying I would or that I was working on it. Most of the time working on it meant I wrote down my goal and a few notes and then became overwhelmed at the thought and pushed it away. Until one day a sister-friend saw I needed a good shove off the ledge. She called and me and said, “Sis you have all the material already for a book. Copy and paste all those Facebook posts, print them out, categorize them and publish your book!” In other words, “Sis stop playing and make a move!” So, that’s exactly what I did.

 

My friend was the catalyst bearing clarity I needed to clearly see the steps and path I needed to take to reach my goal. Once that path was laid, it was nothing to complete. I had a book self-published so fast even I was in awe of myself. Luckily for me that fire is still burning and the urge to create is still there. So, I’m writing and blogging and creating, preparing for my next project or projects. I’m trying not to worry too much about sales and projections. I understand to finish big you must start small and I’m already claiming greater works and greater sales in my future endeavors.

 

That’s the thing about dreams, you must keep pushing and working on them. No matter what the outlook may look like. The adversary will try to trick you into believing your good wasn’t good enough, or that your best fell short. But I know that light flows out of darkness, the flame will spark, if you are patient and just keep pushing!

 

Refocus, reorganize, re-energize but don’t you dare quit!

~Micaiah

Reflecting on my blessing

November is my birth month and as I get ready to celebrate my 47th revolution around the sun on the 10th I sit back and think of what my life has been so far.

I must thank my parents, a bittersweet contemplation as they are both no longer on this earth with me. I continue to hold them in my heart and I pray I am a good representation of what they were both like as parents and individuals.

47 years and still so much I want to accomplish but I’ve learned that you can’t discount the little things in your life when counting blessings.

Sometimes we get caught up waiting for the “big blessings” and forget to be OK with having enough. There are so many people that do need have enough to meet their basic needs and yet we all get caught up in the vanity of our desires. But it’s here and now as I contemplate my life thus far that I make a conscious effort to be OK with enough. I know that more good things are destined for my life, but even if there weren’t I couldn’t complain because I’ve been greatly blessed. Blessed with a 2-parent home growing up, siblings, friends that became family, great school experiences, introduction to art and culture, self-identity, traveling outside my city and state, motherhood, skills, creative mind-set, nursing career and more. Phew! That’s a lot to be thankful for.

I also have come to realize how important it is to take the time to make the time. We often say we are too busy with life, family and work. But when you lose a loved one or friend and you reflect on all the missed moments that you were “too busy” you come to realize that you will make time and effort for things and people that are truly important. Love just can’t be spoken it has to be shown to truly be felt in its wholeness. There is no better feeling than true love, friendship and admiration. If someone crosses your mind call them or visit. Don’t rely on social media and allow it to replace the intimacy of human contact and interaction.

And although at times I think I should be much further in life than I am, I also understand I am exactly where I need to be, and I helped exactly who I needed to by being exactly where I am. So, I am appreciating and trusting the process.

I will continue to dream my dreams and chase my goals. I will take the time, to make the time for family and friends. I will laugh, love and live. Most of all I will be thankful for enough and remember that I am enough personified!

Remember to make the time between the dash count!

~Micaiah

Multi-masking

Sometimes in our quest to find fulfillment, we become overwhelmed and our mind shuts down.

We can envision so many scenarios for our life but unless we stick to one path and one goal at a time, the road becomes cluttered with an overabundance of paths that lead to nowhere. It’s impossible to learn to walk without learning the art of taking one step at a time, such is true in regard to progression in life.

There very well may be a broad picture, but sometimes we have to allow ourselves to work up to that, one stroke and one step at a time. Not allowing ourselves to measure our progress through the comparison of others seemingly on similar paths. Each journey is different and each lesson is Divinely tailored for the person receiving it.

We have to learn to be patient and for some waiting is so very difficult. But when we attempt to push when we are supposed to be still, the Supreme Power has a way of shutting us down and forcing us to be still and listen to instruction. It’s impossible to listen when one is not focused and one cannot be focused when energies are concentrated on a multitude of things all at once. It’s when we are unfocused that we often find we are busy, yet still accomplishing nothing, because we have not devoted ourselves 100% to one thing at a time.

There is a difference between multi-tasking and multi-masking, multi-tasking is completing or performing multiple tasks at the same time to a desired end. Multi-masking is the appearance of making moves when no progression or completion of tasks is actually ever made.

We have to allow ourselves breathing room, learning how to not only be patient with others, but more importantly with ourselves.

So stop trying to force your neighbor’s shoes onto your feet and stop trying to follow the map to someone else’s life, it won’t lead you to your treasure.

Stop worrying about how your life looks to others and get busy one step towards progress at a time

Instead, BE STILL. LISTEN. PLAN. Then FOLLOW your plan to get to your desired end result.~micaiah

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