So I started with some hoarseness Friday 17th attributed to sleeping to close to AC vent didn’t feel horrible so didn’t think much of it. Sat morning dry cough that quickly became moist and accompanied by chills. Started isolating as not to give Jamiyah my “cold”. Continued all my immune boosting daily supplements. Sunday morning awakened with no sense of taste or smell and a 102 fever. Scheduled an appt for Trihealth in Walgreens and tested for Covid. Went back home and continued strict isolation precautions. Purchased pulse ox to closely monitor myself. At first I was staying 95-97% in room air then noticed fevers not staying away and sats dropping some. Tuesday result positive for Covid. Continued to push fluids, herbs, supplements, teas and lots of prayers. Weds night I felt I couldn’t breath as deeply and temp spiked higher, Early Thursday I could barely breath after going to bathroom so headed to Good Sam ER. Diagnosed with pneumonia on top of Covid and admitted. Breathing has been a struggle and I am on supplemental oxygen but I am doing better than some so I won’t complain. The Nurses at Good Sam have been great. My Dr Anjum Najeed has been proactive and started me on Redemsivir so today will be dose 3, praying to see real marked improvement. This has been rough to put it mildly, but I have so many praying friends and family members that even though I am physically without visitors I feel surrounded by love and support. Special thanks to The Almighty that has already told me I’ll be victorious in this battle and for blessing me with a daughter that is wise beyond her years and understands far more than even some adults. Also thanks to my sister Rhonda Baker Napier and cousin Jamasha Hardy for ensuring I don’t have to worry about Jamiyah while fighting my way back to health. To all my sisters, sister-friends, brothers, friends, aunts, uncles, cousins, play cousins, God parents, bffs, nieces and nephew’s and coworkers. I love and appreciate you all! Keep the prayers coming. Victory is Near❤️❤️❤️❤️HalleLuYAH!!!!
I do not need color blind friends, because if you claim not to see color then, do you really see me?
Do you see the inherent differences in the way people of color are treated? How we are asked to forget and get over our trauma while others are allowed to embrace theirs.
I need people who see the differences and fight to change those things which are wrong and unjust. If you are not a person of color you may never understand exactly what we are up against and that’s ok. Just be empathetic towards our fight and not silently complicit.
No one would have to shout Black Lives Matter if All Lives truly Mattered because we would be included in that number. But clearly, we are not included and that’s why we continue to make noise!
The government has shown us repeatedly a closed mouth don’t get fed. If we want change we have to demand it, asking nicely since 1619 has gotten us nothing but traumatized.
Today my Healthcare corporation encouraged us to participate in an 8 minute and 46 second moment of silence in honor of Mr. George Floyd and in solidarity with White Coats for Black Lives Matter (WCBL). WCBL is “an organization that strives to dismantle racism in medicine and promote the health, well-being, and self-determination of the African American community.”
During those 8 minutes and 46 seconds I couldn’t help but to think of all the things that must have flashed through Mr. Floyd’s mind, while seemingly coming to the stark realization that the police was literally killing him. I can’t even fathom what he must have been feeling and the helplessness of being rendered breathless.
I kept having that video of him being murdered, because that’s what it was, play over in a loop in my head. And of how tired I am of explaining to my 7 year old daughter that another person of color has lost their life at the hands of someone who sees them as less than, all while attempting to instill into her that she is enough.
Racism in America, like a festering wound and abhorrent disease, has been left untreated since the nation was birthed. It’s a sickness that effects the young, old and all in between.
How can we tout this as the best nation on earth when animals get more respect and protection than people of color?
When will I not have to say extra prayers for all my male friends and family members that their lives are not taken during a simple traffic stop or interaction with the police.
Yes, we try to teach our youth how to act to stay alive, but until people stop placing symbolic bullseyes on their heads and back, hunting season continues in spite of being compliant.
All lives matter, but until Black Lives Matter there will be no peace because there won’t be any justice for us. Understand this country was founded on the backs of the people that they no longer deem matter, how hypocritical is that?
There are too many disparities in healthcare, education and the justice system for people to feel comfortable sticking their head in the sand and pretending to be unaware of what takes place around them. We know you see it, you show us with your silence that until it effects you directly you don’t care.
If you aren’t helping resolve the problems you may as well be throwing fire on the flames. You care if people mistreat their dog, yet act confounded that people would feel so strongly against the mistreatment of a whole collective group of people.
Surely, not a nation that state in God they trust! Do you not understand the same God you say you trust, created us.
When will enough, be enough for you? It’s past time for me.✊🏽🖤
A friend of mine posted a picture by this amazing and talented artist ➡️ nettartanddesigns.com
and my creative juices went to work on a poem.
So check out the poem and more importantly check out his website above for amazing art work, paintings, illustrations and more…👨🏾🎨🎨
Nine whole months my mother nurtured me
thinking once I’m born I’d be free
but this country has a plan for me
they branded me with a target
and planted seeds subliminally
they start off by labeling me in school
it’s not in a child’s nature to sit still for hours
but they change the narrative because they hold the power
I can’t see myself pictured in any of the books unless it’s February or the images have labels of thugs and crooks
White washing history, not allowing images of our greatness before slavery to make their way to me
Inoculating my body and indoctrinating my mind
Then have the nerve to blame my parents for why I have no culture or pride
They poison the food
and set the mood for my down fall
dreams get shattered and scattered
across sidewalks littered with trash and filled with shadows
shadows of people meant to serve and protect
yet they look awful suspect, when killing someone based on the color or their skin
oh wait they fit a description once again?
freedom can only be used loosely
police step on necks where those nooses used to be
bullets end lives quicker
because the earth is so much sicker
so my brown eyes cry every day since my birth
knowing this cold world doesn’t see my worth.
never can say good bye
even after a year it still seems foreign to try
I remember being awakened from my sleep
to cries that you were now resting in peace
for a second I lost touch with reality
Could this really be true
but I soon gained more proof
the world had truly lost you
it’s hard living life with no more talks
no more shared books read
or inside jokes
I just knew we’d grow to be old folks
You were my sister, my friend and a spiritual sharpener
when your soul left
time seemed to stand still
it felt surreal
I was bereft
left fumbling to rationalize within my mind,
to accept this loss as a truth
There are days I’m great
and there’s days when simply I’m not
I know life is for living so I keep pushing I dare not stop
There is so much more I needed to share
so much more wisdom and encouragement I needed to hear
You were a sister-friend so near and dear to my heart.
I carry your memories forever with me may they never depart.
Continue to rest in power Sis💙
Hilakiyah Yisrael 3/10/70-5/5/2019
Life is all about learning from experience’s, sometimes we are a little slow on the uptake and have to repeat a lesson.
We often allow our emotions to guide decisions that only our mind is truly qualified to make. I know it’s hard to let go of how you feel, even when you know it’s for your own best interest.
So you pray, praying steadfast to take that feeling away. And in time your prayers are answered only for you to turn around and be tested.
Do you hold firm? or do you fold to the tantalizing memory of the addictive high?
And if this one time you fold will whoever or whatever forever have a hold of you?
I say not necessarily, sometimes we have to experience something more than once to get the true lesson from it. Everyone has a different barometer by which to measure what they can and cannot tolerate. Maybe it took that second time to reach the peak of your limits.
Hell, it may take some people multiple times and guess what? That’s their business and their prerogative.
One thing life has taught me is not to judge the hearts and lives of others, because as soon as you say what you won’t do or what you won’t put up with the Almighty or Universe will surely test you.
I don’t know about you, but I’ve had enough tests to last several lifetimes already.
So be easy with yourself.
Now, I’m not saying settle for less than you deserve or to put up with abusive behavior. What I am saying is that ultimately it’s your life to live and you have to come to terms with what and who you allow in it and for how long.
Don’t base your life and limits by comparing it to another. Comparison is the thief of joy, do well to remember looks can be deceiving, because even salt can look like sugar.
So what looks sweet may not really be.
Trust grass grows greener wherever it’s tended to and watered. Effort proceeds progress.
So take those lessons on the chin and resolve yourself to let go of the past, grow your future and begin again as many times as you need to.
My two cents from a homeschooling momma, due to the “pandemic” children are out of school and families have new normals. Parents now would be a great time to ensure your children are actually learning what they are being taught. Just because children are passed doesn’t necessarily mean they are learning. You have an opportunity to do some one-on-one teaching with your child even if it’s done outside of traditional school hours. Trust me when I say 20-30 minutes goes a long way when it’s not spread among 25-30 kids. Take the time to ensure they are also learning essential life skills: cooking, shopping, finance (saving, stocks, balancing debits/credits), gardening etc. Even children with IEPs can soar when given more time and attention, often not allowable in a traditional classroom setting. If you don’t know something go online. Youtube has great instructional videos and Khan academy is another great resource or make a facebook post requesting help, utilize your village. Please use this time to reconnect or connect even deeper with your children. Learning is life long, happens all around us and most importantly, it starts at home.❤️~micaiahism
Sometimes it’s not the intimate aspect of the relationship you miss, it’s the friendship
The ability for someone to know you better than you know yourself
Someone that knows your moods and can communicate without conversation
someone that can pull a smile from you even when you are annoyingly aggravated
Someone you can be free with without judgment
Even when you’re afraid to uncover your heart, they feed you laughter as medicine and help cure your hidden and broken parts
Because sometimes we don’t truly heal, because we are so intent on not being able to feel
Sometimes we blur the line and it takes time to get back aligned with the true purpose for you and them
Maybe you were not ever meant to be in love
because the greater need is to be a friend
and in the end
in that realization
is where true happiness and healing begins.