Divine Conversations

Restless nights

the tired body

of an overworked mind

racing thoughts

subconscious longings

alone in bed

ideas take root in my head

clarity comes

revealing itself slowly

like a dawn breaking the horizon

when slumber is fleeting

I obtain the peace I seek

‘fore if I quiet my mind

and listen closely

I hear God speak

~micaiah

I Wish I didn’t Know

I wish I didn’t know…

that one day every living thing must one day go

back to the dust from which it came.

I wish I didn’t know…

that sometimes people don’t get healed

and pain unleashed reveals itself in an avalanche of tears.

I wish I didn’t know…

That cancer is a monster and not just a sign of the zodiac

it doesn’t respect persons old or young and runs you ragged and tortures you before it’s done.

I wish I didn’t know…

friendships don’t always last until you grow old

sometimes death severs it’s hold.

I wish I didn’t know…

Life will give you bitter with the sweet

and bad things sometimes happens to the good folks you meet.

I wish I didn’t know…

That grief can last forever, it’s coping mechanisms that change

When you lose someone you love,

life is never quite the same.

I wish I didn’t know.

~micaiah

Changing Seasons

Her heart was warm and vibrant pumping a selfless type of love

It pumped until its chambers were depleted

a supply unreciprocated will dry up

and like the changing seasons

her personality changed too

unrequited love changed her confidence into insecurity

She couldn’t quite remember when she lost sight of herself

She’s pretty sure it happened when she was pouring so much into others

Somehow they gained vibrancy at her expense as she turned into a less vibrant copy of her former self

Somehow she started to internalize the outward inaction of another and took ownership of issues that didn’t start with her

and they allowed her to because she was to magnificent to behold in all her technicolor majestic-ness

But with her bathed in shades of grey they seemed so much more appealing than they actually were

So they attempted to lull her into accepting the fantasy as a reality

and for a while they were successful

they tied those rose colored glasses to her face with strings of lies, laden with whispers of sweet nothings and orgasmic soul ties

Emotions took control and logic took a back seat

And the color continued to be drained from her

until her insides were as black as a starless night

She lost her zeal and ultimately her appeal and the love leech went scouting for a new host

leaving her to fall freely

and for a while she lay there covered in blackness and feeling buried

until realizing during her fall those glasses and bindings were knocked loose

there was a light in the darkness

as she sprouted from the darkness

she realized she was never buried

she was planted

and as she grew into a new version of herself

her color returned

along with a fierce love of self

the season had changed and

so had she

this was her season

she was back and more vibrant than before

because she realized her moment of weakness and falling

did not define her

her ability

to get back up did.

~micaiah

A love more deserving

She loved him past his faults

And despite his flaws.

She loved him when his words

didn’t match his actions.

She loved his potential,

her vision of how great he could be.

She loved him

until

she realized her love

couldn’t change him

no, only he could do that.

And while she loved him,

through the hurt and disappointment,

she grew and evolved

to the point she recognized

it was time to let go

and love herself more

than she loved him.

And when she let go,

she allowed herself

to be blessed

with a love more deserving.

~micaiah

What I Won’t Do

I don’t need anyone to complete me I’m already whole

I’ve been figured out I’m enough, since I’ve been surviving and thriving in a world so tough

although I may not need you financially

I want you mentally, physically and emotionally

I refuse to dumb myself down just to feed your ego or support your waning masculinity

I can be a source of strength and help mate if you let me be

But first you have to see me as more than just a wet and warm good time

How about you stop ogling my breast and concentrate on my mind

Keep your sweet nothings, I feed off honesty

Please tell me no lies

You say you want someone more needy and softer

Yet you walked all over the last one like that and her self-esteem it cost her

We need to get back that complete and deep love of self

so we’ll be able to recognize and expect that same type of effort from someone else

Let’s get back to respecting and praying for one another

Instead of playing and preying with the hearts of one another

We need one another to survive

But we have to make sure we can offer more than what’s in our pockets or in between our thighs

because time is short and my patience is too

So playing myself by accepting less is something I just won’t do.

-micaiah

Kisses like Wishes

Kisses like wishes

That make dreams come true

Drawing smiley faces on papers

Lost in thoughts of you

I see traces of you and I expressed

Vicariously through watching the love of others

As I wonder how many more minutes

Before we are entrenched in the heat

And scent of one another

I wear the essence of you like perfume

It’s the sweetest of smells to me

It’s an unspoken testament of

your promise to be there for me

As you split my thighs like the Red Sea

Performed miracles to win my heart from me

Our bodies touched and souls knew

That there would never be another who’d do

The things that we do to one another

Too holy to be voodoo

Yet unholy enough to make us blush at the memories

Of just how open we are for one another

You breathed life in me and I exhaled the stress out of you

As we created a mystic language entangled in arms and legs

Exchanging energies

We don’t lose

it’s a reciprocal cycle of charging you

and you in turn recharging me

Kisses like wishes

Forever lost in thoughts of you.

~Micaiah

Dawning

She didn’t cry all the time

She ate, didn’t starve herself and lose uncalculated weight

She didn’t sleep all day or cover her head and stay in bed

She perfected the art of being “fine”

When looked upon by others

She laughed when it was appropriate and even smiled

though at times

It didn’t reach her eyes

She slept when she wasn’t tossing and turning

Yearning to be settled

Her mind raced even when she seemed at rest

Her heart knew the truth she wasn’t at her best

Her concentration was slacking

And she became misty-eyed and sentimental over the smallest of things

She worked and she prayed

And it seemed at times night morphed straight into a day

It stunted her vision and clouded her words

Made it hard for her creative mind to be heard

Yet she kept pushing day by day

To keep the heaviness of loss and grief at bay

Because she had faith to know she would one day truly be ok

So she gave herself time and permission to grieve and room to breathe

Knowing she had to work it all out in her own way

She understood implicitly sad times wouldn’t last always

And with the dawning of the Sun, there would soon be brighter days.

~Micaiah