Embrace Your Inner Queen: A Journey to Self-Worth and Empowerment

I speak from the perspective of a woman, for that is who I am.

As women, we sometimes accept preconceived notions and convince ourselves that these notions serve us well. For instance, when faced with men who habitually cheat—there is a stark difference between a man who deceives and betrays, and one who honestly expresses his desire not to be monogamous. The truth may hurt, but it remains the truth.

Some women accept the deceitful behavior of a cheating partner as evidence that all men cheat, resigning themselves to being treated as less deserving. They endure lies and disrespect, believing it’s better to stick with the familiar than to risk the unknown. They fail to realize that a lack of boundaries fosters a lack of respect.

You cannot accept someone’s garbage and then wonder why they treat you like trash. This is akin to Stockholm Syndrome—loving and empathizing with your abuser. Placing yourself in a situation where you are degraded through lies and treachery is emotional and mental abuse, leading to feelings of worthlessness and low self-esteem.

What you allow is what will continue. You must command respect, and if those demands are not met, love yourself enough to walk away from any situation where you are treated as less than the treasure you are.

Women, do not view being alone as being lonely. Use that time to define and refine yourself. Treat yourself to all the things you deserve. Discover the beauty and peace in self-love and self-respect, and experience the soul-fulfilling joy of peace of mind.

Never allow someone else to become so important that you lose yourself and your dignity. Forgive yourself for lapses in judgment and poor decisions. As you learn better, be determined to do better. You cannot move forward safely if you are stuck looking backward.

A Queen does not cease to be royalty simply because there is no King by her side. Clothe yourself in love, crown yourself in self-worth, and never allow anyone to treat you as less than the regal woman you are.

Everyone has played the fool for love at some point; the key is not becoming comfortable in that role.~micaiah

The Unfortunate Habit of getting Burned

When you are little your parents, if they are the nurturing and loving sort, try to warn you from all the ills in life that will bring you pain. They tell you, “No, sweetie don’t touch that hot pot you’ll get burned.” “Don’t climb so high you’ll fall down.” And sometimes you listen and stayed safe and sometimes curiosity killed the cat or at least curiosity burned your hand, as you learned the hard way that it hurts to touch a hot stove.

People that give and give of themselves, never setting boundaries with others that gladly take from them, are like that small child, that heard the warning yet still took the chance of being burned.

Sure, everyone knows that you can’t pour from an empty cup. But no one explains how to break the cycle of feeling as if we have to please people in order to feel love. Or how gratifying it can be to give to yourself what you so freely give to others.

From the time we are young, we see examples of our mothers giving of themselves to take care of the children, the home and their mate/husband. We see single moms that make things happen when there is seemingly no way they should. We see adults tired, working day in and day out so their families can survive. So, we absorb that mentality that you give to those you care about even if they never have anything to give you, you just keep giving. Even to the point of defeat and exhaustion. Working and giving of themselves sometimes straight into early graves.

It’s a seriously flawed concept. One that often leads to couples staying together to raise children only to divorce later once the kids are “old enough,” often feeling they lived a life unfulfilled. And single moms feeling as if they wasted all their good years on their grown, ungrateful kids. While sometimes that is the case, oftentimes these feelings are a result of extreme burn out. Of having your soul depleted to the point you have nothing to give, not a thought, worry or care, not even for yourself.

We have to change the mindset that is is better to give than to receive. Let’s say, it’s better to give just as much as you get, even if those things you get are a result of your own doing. We have to learn to refill our cups. We are solely responsible for maintaining our inner peace and happiness. Can other people lend to those feelings? Absolutely! But they are not the driving force behind those feelings. That is an inside job.

People will tell you “No” is a complete sentence. Yet, you will still worry your nerves over saying it, feeling as if you need to expound on the reason. You do not have to feel guilty for using your excess on yourself. Whether that excess is time, money or energy. You are not obligated to give so much of yourself to anyone that it leaves you with nothing left for you.

You have to learn to schedule and set aside time for yourself. Give yourself gifts, write yourself notes affirming how amazing you are. Buy yourself those flowers, or that pretty dress. Dress up just because you like the way it makes you feel. When you start treating yourself right and ensuring your cup stays full. People will reap the benefit of your overflow. You’ll be so full, you can’t help but to give that overflow to others and it won’t even be as noticeable.

Stop allowing yourself to be burned by the expectations of others. Stop equating your acts of service as fair exchange for love, affection and appreciation. Those things should be given freely and not contingent on what someone can get from or out of you.

You are too amazing to keep allowing your soul to be exhausted. Guard yourself and set those boundaries. People that truly love you will never want to see you get burned.

~Micaiah

My wish for 2022

I didn’t make any resolutions per say, I’d label them more goals, manifestations or key words.

I’m working towards being a better me daily.

My keywords are: completion, abundance, dedication and renew.

I fervently hope 2022 brings fresh energy with it and good health. This pandemic has been rough to live through, but we take the bitter with the sweet and keep it pushing.

I hope people give themselves the grace they extend to others this year.

I hope people learn to love themselves in such a way that it lends itself to treating others better as well.

Even if the world is unkind, I plan to practice more mindfulness and being grateful.

I plan to love myself so well, others smile when they see my happy glow.

Big changes can occur by first taking small steps.

Sometimes we overwhelm ourselves by planning too big.

We need to take small bite sized portions of those big plans to make them more manageable.

Also, having more small steps can give you a greater sense of accomplishment when you are able to scratch them off as completed. Let 2022 be about celebrating the small wins too.

We may not have arrived at our desired destination, but if we give ourselves credit we’ve done far more than we often realize.

So, 2022 is about self-love, self-care, space from people, things and energy that no longer serve you and grace.

I pray you find peace and joy in the simple things and that you understand sometimes you are more rich than your back account would imply.

No matter what your dreams, goals, resolutions or aspirations look like, I am claiming they all come true! Let’s go have an awesome year, no matter what comes our way!

~Micaiah

No discounts

Some people don’t truly want you, but they want to reserve their place in your life.

They see the value of your connections, even when they attempt to devalue your personal worth.

People will attempt to play with your mind, because it makes it easier to steer your heart.

That’s why you have to set your price and stand firm, and never allow someone with a low budget mentality bring down your self-worth.

micaiah

Design a site like this with WordPress.com
Get started