Tag: acceptance

The Weight of the Hold

It’s the disrespect of the timing,

the way it ignores the “all clear” we celebrated in November.

It didn’t just knock; it broke down the door,

bringing its uninvited chaos into rooms where we were finally starting to breathe again.

So now, the air sits heavy in my lungs,

a jagged stone I’m forced to carry while I play the roles:

the worker, the parent, the nurse-sister , the encourager, the pillar.

Learning to Exhale

But you can’t hold a ghost of a breath forever.

Learning to exhale isn’t about letting go of the anger,

I want to keep that fire; it’s the only thing that feels honest right now.

It’s about realizing that if I don’t let the air out,

there is no room for the strength I need to sit by her side.

Exhaling is the quietest form of rebellion.

It is saying: You may have taken the peace of November,

and you may be trying to take her body,

but you will not have my ability to simply be here nor her will to fight.

So I breathe out the “why us” and the “not again,”

just for a second,

not because the world is better,

and certainly not because cancer deserves any grace,

but because my sister needs me to have oxygen in my lungs as we battle to dominate the cancer in hers.

We rinse, we repeat, we fight.

But first, we let the breath go.

Even if it shakes. Even if it hurts.

~Micaiah

Why ask why?

We’re taught not to question the Almighty. To accept. To bow our heads. To trust without trembling.

But if He knows my heart… if He knows my thoughts before they ever form on my tongue… doesn’t He already know my questions too?

I find it impossible, as a human wrapped in human emotions, not to ask why when bad things happen to good people. And yes, I understand that “good” can be debated. None of us are perfect. But I’m talking about the ones who live gently. The ones who work hard, tend to their families, mind their business, show up for others, try to leave rooms softer than they found them. The ones who do inherently good simply because it’s in them to do so.

Why must the good suffer?

Why cancer? Why the slow violence of chemotherapy, a treatment that often feels more offensive and destructive than the very disease it’s meant to eradicate? Why the indignity of fatigue that steals your strength, the nausea that robs you of appetite, the hair that falls in quiet surrender? Why must the body endure a war on two fronts?

It is a particular kind of helplessness to watch someone you love suffer. To stand beside hospital beds and infusion chairs with nothing but prayers and presence. To offer words that feel small against the weight of a diagnosis. “I’m here.” “I love you.” “We’re believing.” And sometimes those words feel like feathers trying to hold back a storm.

Yet time after time, that is what we do. We pray. We support. We show up. Because we believe prayer changes things. Because even when I question the why behind it all, one thing I never question is my ability to trust fully in the Almighty. I do not understand His timing. I do not understand His methods. But I trust His heart. And I believe in Him for full healing for those I love who are afflicted.

Right now, that someone is my sister.

She fought one hell of a battle against triple negative breast cancer. She endured it. Conquered it. Had a clear scan this past November. We exhaled. We praised. We dared to imagine the worst was behind us.

Only for that sneaky, sick disease to circle back and attack her lung and liver.

And here we are again.

We’re already claiming victory. We’re already speaking healing. But we are also human, and it’s exhausting to have to suit up for war twice. It’s disheartening to realize the fight isn’t finished. It’s frustrating to see someone so strong forced back into the ring.

Make no mistake, she is one hell of a fighter. Resilient. Determined. Courageous in ways that humble me. I just wish she didn’t have to be. I wish her strength could be used for joy instead of survival. But like people in hell want ice water, we deal with the hand we’re dealt. We don’t get to choose the battlefield, only how we stand on it.

So we stand again.

We question, yes.

We grieve, yes.

But we also believe.

If you believe in God and the power of prayer, send some healing her way. Speak life over her lungs. Speak restoration over her liver. Speak strength into her bones and peace into her mind.

It’s time to get back in the ring.

And we’re believing this time, too, cancer is getting knocked out.~micaiah 

Honor Time: A Call to Intentional Living

Time is one of the most precious gifts we have—and yet, it’s often the one we take for granted. We get caught up in the grind: working endlessly, chasing material things, and letting days slip by without truly connecting with the people who matter most.

What Really Matters

Life isn’t about possessions. It’s about presence. It’s about being intentional with our friends, our loved ones, and ourselves. The truth is, tomorrow isn’t promised. And when someone is gone, you can’t go back and fix what was broken. That’s why healing, forgiveness, and meaningful connection are so vital.

Boundaries vs. Bitterness

This isn’t about tolerating disrespect or putting yourself in harm’s way. Boundaries are sacred. But sometimes, the walls we build are made of ego, miscommunication, and pain we’ve held onto for too long. We remember how we felt, but not why. And that pain? It limits us. It steals joy from the moments we could be living fully.

Choose Healing

Take the time to heal. Let go of grudges that no longer serve you. Choose peace over pettiness. Choose love over pride. And choose a daily “diet” that feeds your soul—one free of negativity, pessimism, and drama. Nourish your mind, body, and spirit with things that uplift and inspire.

In the end, God isn’t counting your degrees or your designer labels. He’s looking at your heart. So live with intention. Love deeply. And honor the time you’ve been given.~micaiah

Embrace Your Inner Queen: A Journey to Self-Worth and Empowerment

I speak from the perspective of a woman, for that is who I am.

As women, we sometimes accept preconceived notions and convince ourselves that these notions serve us well. For instance, when faced with men who habitually cheat—there is a stark difference between a man who deceives and betrays, and one who honestly expresses his desire not to be monogamous. The truth may hurt, but it remains the truth.

Some women accept the deceitful behavior of a cheating partner as evidence that all men cheat, resigning themselves to being treated as less deserving. They endure lies and disrespect, believing it’s better to stick with the familiar than to risk the unknown. They fail to realize that a lack of boundaries fosters a lack of respect.

You cannot accept someone’s garbage and then wonder why they treat you like trash. This is akin to Stockholm Syndrome—loving and empathizing with your abuser. Placing yourself in a situation where you are degraded through lies and treachery is emotional and mental abuse, leading to feelings of worthlessness and low self-esteem.

What you allow is what will continue. You must command respect, and if those demands are not met, love yourself enough to walk away from any situation where you are treated as less than the treasure you are.

Women, do not view being alone as being lonely. Use that time to define and refine yourself. Treat yourself to all the things you deserve. Discover the beauty and peace in self-love and self-respect, and experience the soul-fulfilling joy of peace of mind.

Never allow someone else to become so important that you lose yourself and your dignity. Forgive yourself for lapses in judgment and poor decisions. As you learn better, be determined to do better. You cannot move forward safely if you are stuck looking backward.

A Queen does not cease to be royalty simply because there is no King by her side. Clothe yourself in love, crown yourself in self-worth, and never allow anyone to treat you as less than the regal woman you are.

Everyone has played the fool for love at some point; the key is not becoming comfortable in that role.~micaiah

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