Fighting to Matter

To be black and live in America is to live through trauma.

Black lives do not matter. Animals and walls get more respect and consideration than black people do.

People are murdered in their homes and yet they are made to be villains.
Even in their deaths the world tries hard to turn the tables so even sympathy is not given.

Oppression makes a wise man mad. And continually perpetuating trauma makes a person numb.

But
life goes on and we keep pushing because our souls weren’t created to quit.

Some of us march, some pray, others protests, rebel and raise holy hell and no one can say any of them are wrong.

Because collectively we are grieving and enraged all at the same time; we have lost so many and each death effected us, even if only subconsciously.

Every death by the hands of the police has you questioning your safety during what should be a routine traffic stop.

Have you reconsidering mentioning the police as someone a child can turn to and be safe with in times of trouble.

Parents have had to change the narrative of their coming of age stories especially with their black male children to include how to live through an interaction with the police.

It’s crazy to have to explain that typically black people are seen as guilty until proven innocent and even then they are sometimes still punished.

Society might have removed the chains, but they’ve held fast to the cruelties and tenets of slavery.

Yet somehow we still make strides and make moves because our souls weren’t created to quit.

With tear stained faces and red rimmed eyes we still stand tall with our fists held high.

Burdened by the struggle to be recognized as human, worthy of life, deserving of justice.
Fighting to matter.
~micaiah

Hil

never can say good bye
even after a year it still seems foreign to try
I remember being awakened from my sleep
to cries that you were now resting in peace
for a second I lost touch with reality
Could this really be true
but I soon gained more proof
the world had truly lost you
it’s hard living life with no more talks
no more shared books read
or inside jokes
I just knew we’d grow to be old folks
You were my sister, my friend and a spiritual sharpener
when your soul left
time seemed to stand still
it felt surreal
I was bereft
left fumbling to rationalize within my mind,
to accept this loss as a truth
There are days I’m great
and there’s days when simply I’m not
I know life is for living so I keep pushing I dare not stop
There is so much more I needed to share
so much more wisdom and encouragement I needed to hear
You were a sister-friend so near and dear to my heart.
I carry your memories forever with me may they never depart.
~micaiah

Continue to rest in power Sis💙
Hilakiyah Yisrael 3/10/70-5/5/2019

The Circle of Life

Whenever anyone dies, it’s a humbling moment to remind us all of our mortality. No matter how we live or our socioeconomic backgrounds, we all have an expiration date.

Whether you believe in a higher power or not doesn’t negate the certainty of death.

The recent unexpected and tragic death of Kobe Bryant along with 8 other individuals rocked many.

Unexpected deaths are always hard, because there is no time to prepare or guard your emotions.

Now that I’m in my late forties and both my parents and several close friends have passed, it’s hard not to get caught up in an avalanche of grief and tears when hearing about the death of others.

It’s as if the grief of others, stirs up a hornets nest of emotions within me and I know from reading other peoples social media posts and comments that I’m not alone in those feelings.

I honestly have to force myself to limit time on social media as it can become too heavy a burden to bear. Energy no matter the source, can be transferred.

It’s important to take time for self care and to regroup after tragic events or the death of others.

It’s easy to allow the darkness and cloak of depression to envelop you into a false sense of comfort.

Don’t be fooled, your light is not out. The flame may have flickered, but as long as you have breath that light still shines.

So, I’ve committed to living more intentionally.

To appreciate the days and make them count.

To create new and lasting memories.

To live, laugh and love and show appreciation for all those in my life.

To let go of the small stuff and focus on the bigger picture.

I’ve committed to be a better version of myself and live each day to the fullest, because we never know when it will be our last.

~Micaiah

I Wish I didn’t Know

I wish I didn’t know…

that one day every living thing must one day go

back to the dust from which it came.

I wish I didn’t know…

that sometimes people don’t get healed

and pain unleashed reveals itself in an avalanche of tears.

I wish I didn’t know…

That cancer is a monster and not just a sign of the zodiac

it doesn’t respect persons old or young and runs you ragged and tortures you before it’s done.

I wish I didn’t know…

friendships don’t always last until you grow old

sometimes death severs it’s hold.

I wish I didn’t know…

Life will give you bitter with the sweet

and bad things sometimes happens to the good folks you meet.

I wish I didn’t know…

That grief can last forever, it’s coping mechanisms that change

When you lose someone you love,

life is never quite the same.

I wish I didn’t know.

~micaiah

Design a site like this with WordPress.com
Get started